Access or Download: Module 3: Relationship Red Flags and Green Flags — Facilitator Guide

Please take our SQUINCH survey after you use this module: tinyurl.com/SQUINCH

Goals:

Know where to go for support if you are in an unhealthy relationship

Learn red flags to look for in abusive relationships

Learn green flags to look for in respectful relationships

Contrast  the LGBTQ+ power and control wheel and LGBTQ+ equality wheel

The module 3 video will discuss in detail the “power and control wheel for gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgender relationships” and the “equality wheel” to prepare the group for this conversation.

Before the meeting:

Find a place to write down relationship must-haves. This could be on a whiteboard or a large paper on the wall.

Print off the three pages of resources: LGBT-Power-and-Control-Wheel

LGBT-Equality-Wheel, and Unhealthy relationship zine (see facilitator guide).  This will need to be cut and trimmed, then folded in half-length wise, and then again in thirds, like a tiny trifold brochure. The result is small enough to fit in your pocket. 

Print off local resources for people surviving sexual abuse or relationship violence.

During the meeting (Instructions given in the video)

• Prepare the club for the heavy topic of relationship violence by sharing resources for survivors.
• Club writing prompt: Write about people in your life that you know are in a healthy relationship. 

• How do you know they are healthy?

• What behaviors, attitudes, and communication do you observe? 

• What do you like about the relationships you have been /are in? 

Say “Turn to the person next to you, and tell each other 3 things you need to have to be present for a romantic and/or sexual relationship to be healthy or positive. Be prepared to share one with the rest of the club.”

When people share in the large group, write down their answers on the whiteboard or large paper. 

Sometimes talking about violence or signs of violence can trigger painful memories.

We are about to talk about situations that signal unhealthy relations. These are sometimes violent behaviors. If you feel overwhelmed with emotion (anger, sadness, fear, numbness, etc.) you might be feeling triggered. Talk before the video about what you can do if you feel triggered. 

Ask the club who they trust. 

NM Crisis and Access Line: Call toll free anytime 24/7/365 1-855-NMCRISIS (662-7474)

Peer to Peer Warmline: Call or text to connect with a peer 1-855-4NM-7100 (466-7100), call 3:30pm – 11:30pm / text 6pm – 11pm

They have an app called NMCONNECT for android and apple devices

You can text a peer support worker on the app.

Agora Crisis Center has excellent policies and training for LGBTQ+ issues. 

505-277-3013,  866-HELP-1-NM

800-273-TALK (National Suicide Prevention Lifeline)

You can text chat here

Offer a phone number and website to a local rape crisis line. Find your local sexual assault service provider here: https://nmcsap.org/find-help/sexual-assault-service-providers-sasp2/

National Teen Dating Abuse Helpline: Text LOVEIS to 22522 or speak to a peer advocate here 1-800-331-9474.

Watch Module 3 video, and discuss.

Ask club members to take out their phones and fill out our survey about the module.

When you’re done, each person can take our survey: https://tinyurl.com/SQUINCH If you take the survey, your club will be entered to win a prize! We plan to create more modules, so let us know what you want to learn about.

SQUINCH is a digital curriculum for GSA clubs (Gender and Sexuality Alliance/Gay Straight Alliance) to learn healthy relationship skills. Each module contains a video, facilitator’s guide and transcript. SQUINCH stands for Sharing Queer Understanding, Inclusion, Nonviolent Communication, and Health! SQUINCH is a project of the Health Equity Alliance for LGBTQ+ New Mexicans (HEAL Plus NM).

IG: @HEALplusNM

Each learning module can be a standalone discussion or activity for the club, and we encourage GSA student leaders to choose and lead the modules that most interest them.

GSA student leaders are encouraged to read the facilitator’s guide, play the video for the club, and host a discussion on each module. The facilitator’s guide has resources, additional discussion questions, and tips. Find the facilitator guide link at the top of this page.

The video portion of the module includes information, activities, discussion prompts, and quizzes.  Modules can be accessed in any order and any amount.  We do encourage starting with Module 1: Welcome & Group Agreements.

Each video has high-quality closed captioning and transcripts.

Here is the SQUINCH playlist in order:

https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLthhLT1La278IPFZV9C3ua5W8izwnpStU

If you are looking for information about starting or supporting a GSA, contact New Mexico GSA Network.  https://themountaincenter.org/programs/nmgsa/

We warmly appreciate the GSA youth advisors for providing feedback and direction for the development of this curriculum.